By Xenia S. Estrella
I started scrolling to find interesting news on Google, and the 1st headline I saw, read “Psychologists say a good life doesn’t have to be happy, or even meaningful”. A-ha! I had to read that.
Ah. Headlines. Apparently, the news article for this one wasn’t saying that people don’t, not need to be happy. Social psychologists, Shige Oishi from the University of Virginia and Erin Westgate from the University of Florida, were merely presenting the importance of psychological well-being to the overall disposition of an individual: “The researchers aren’t saying that psychological richness operates completely independently from happiness or meaningfulness, but that it’s a part of our well-being that needs more attention.”
Headlines are meant to catch attention. Everybody gets that. It should be the number 1 rule in headline-writing; and it’s also a big way for even lousy videos on social media to get opened! It can be annoying, though, how headlines and storylines at times get confusing — on the verge of deceiving in some cases. I’m not criticizing “influencers” (genuine ones or wanna-be’s). They may just be doing what they perceive SEO standards to dictate. Still, just as headlines are meant to catch attention, man needs to be careful not to overly polish the “us” that we know for others, in our pursuit of love and belongingness.
Be yourself.
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
― Bernard M. Baruch
I love sweet, idealistic, tactful, respectful and friendly me. I love annoying, overly-sensitive, forgetful and unreasonable me, too. I may not be perfect with exemplary adjectives to describe me through and through, but I know I am perfectly imperfect and I try to be better each day. That’s all I can do and that is enough.
There is, obviously, a lot of pressure to be the best in everything everyday; but, unless we develop a firm sense of acceptance for ourselves, these pressures can get to us, stress us out and possibly break us and turn us into pulp. Breaking down is not an option if we want to live the best life possible for ourselves. Why? Because we have to know this to be true: We are all worthy of being loved and taken cared of.
Some points worth pondering on, to live an authentic and accomplished life:
- Know that if others can, you CAN, too! Believe that you are strong. Man is very resilient, and can endure the toughest of situations. We see this in real-life stories of people around the world, from kids who need to walk for two hours just to get to school, to those people who were able to find healing within themselves and rise up from the ashes of slavery and unfathomable abuses.
- Know that you can ask for help. When you can’t yet, somebody can, and is willing to help you. Man is inherently good. There’s bound to be somebody who can support you; but you need to choose to find that person so you can feel better.
- Know that your past, IS past. Don’t be ashamed. We all have to take pride in our willingness to change for the better. We may not be perfect; in fact, we’ll probably keep on making mistakes even as we strive for perfection. Let’s just keep on striving. People who matter will understand; those who don’t can make up all sorts of stories in their heads, for all we care. Stand firm.
- Know that you are alive. Yes, there are people who breathe but somehow don’t feel anything anymore. That cannot be us. If we can relate with, “Life is like a wheel — sometimes you’re up, sometimes you’re down.”, then we understand the phases of life that we just need to contend with. We cannot allow ourselves to be distracted from seeing our worth everytime we see ourselves down.
- Know that there is a greater Power that tells us to take it easy. If there is no God, then there is no hope. If we make choices that we feel can somehow make tomorrow better for us and our loved ones, then hope exists from within. We’re going to be OK.
Life is not fair, but we also do not have to wait for it to be so hard before we can find strength from within us to fight for what we need and to really know who we are. Everyday is basically about choices. It is my prayer that each of us will be confident enough to show who we truly are even when it’s difficult; and find ourselves looking for the light in any dark situation that we might find ourselves in.
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