By Maria Rodriguez
After watching at least dozens of “Coming of Age Movies” (Now And Then, 13 Going On 30, Five Feet Apart, etc) with my parents this quarantine, I have found myself searching for that recessive element in that movie genre. That kind of inexplainable everyday suburban “magic.” And although I was raised in the suburbs throughout most of my early childhood, I didn’t have a best friend (who’s literally) next door with whom I was with all the time since my part of the village is pretty much deserted with empty houses I once feared to be haunted. My closest friendships were normally distanced one village away, which I fondly call “best friend next-village.” And although my friends and I met often, our meet-ups were always scheduled and never (from what I recall) spontaneous — except for graduation dinners. It’s fine though, that my life doesn’t really fit the “coming of age” friendship stereotype. When it comes to my parents, well, they would always take me everywhere they go and the bones of their whole parenting method is really unorthodox.
Looking at the bigger picture, I’m somewhat at peace with not being a living “coming of age” movie trope. From what I learned in life, these type of characters do exist, but their life has a darker side… The children who are readily available to meet-up with friends anytime are usually neglected by their parents and more often than not, don’t have such friends at all. While the children who always have the worldly definition of “youthful fun” (drinking and partying, breaking moral laws, taking on ridiculous immoral life-threatening dares) end up regretting what they’ve done at age 30, and are left with no true friends at all.
I think it’s wonderful that these movies remind us of how enjoyable and amusing youth’s troubles can be, but then it is misconstrued as a standard. So many things meant to become a source of inspiration, joy, and wit turns into a standard when it is indeed a fantasy that when rarely real, is the exception… Not the rule. Now, I’m not just talking about the fantasies we face as children and adolescents, but also something adults chase money, power, fame. If you spend a good amount of time on Facebook, you may (more often than not) come across articles or posts that tell the short tale of success. These stories (at times) leave us hungry for that taste of success ourselves. Just when we try, we fail and feel worthless. Comparing ourselves to a decade-long crooked path to success that was packaged nicely in just a few sentences. Very much like fairy tales, these short stories quickly tell a life of hardship then cutting to a longer story of success. Fame only lasts for how long? The time it takes to achieve it varies, but how long must we let this feeling of discontent dwell? When that happens, we stay true to a part of that “coming of age” stereotype: You never know it’s good until it’s gone.