By Felix C. Veroya
What makes us happy? What we value? At the heart of our values are our passions and interests. And what is happiness without those things we love to do?
Happiness is a lucky by product of living with care and purpose. Of spending time on pursuits that feed your authentic self, not time-sucking distractions that masquerade as “hobbies.” Of fulfilling obligations with self-respect and integrity. Of making small changes in habits, environment, perspective – instead of waiting for an event to give you a life makeover from the outside in. Lifestyle changes build your foundation so you can enjoy more spontaneous moments when they arise.
We each have our own list of “things I will do, and not do.” So here is a starter list to kick-start your journey to happiness:
1. Do what you love.
2. Quit doing what you do not love, so you can spend more time on what you do.
3. Give up addictions that keep you from enjoying life’s spontaneous joys.
4. Make your life about being the best version of yourself – not just getting by with a mediocre strive up version of you.
5. Be kind to yourself.
6. Have a growth mindset – not a fixed mindset.
7. Celebrate wins, but do not dwell on failures.
8. Spend money on things that matter and save money by going slow on other things that do not matter as much to you now.
9. Practice self-regulation so your impulsive urges do not sabotage your life goals or peace of mind (or the lives of those around you).
10. When in doubt, do nothing to let the decision make itself in the hands of time or fate, or whatever higher power you believe in (even if it is just a gut feeling).
Now that we have laid the foundation of where you are starting from, let us get started. What first?
Our lives are not about what happens. It is about how we choose to respond and react.
Because when all is said and done, our lives are about being happy with ourselves – your authentic self. You cannot just turn it on with no effort… or off with a flick of the switch.
“The only constant in life is change” – Marcus Aurelius
Be happy with who you are – not who you wish you could be.
As Jim Rohn says, “You are the sum total of everything that has ever happened to you.” You create your own story by deciding what to do and what not to do. Decide now how things will go for you in life, then live that plan instead of constantly wondering if it could have gone better. Know what is right for your life and enjoy living it out without regrets. After all, “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” – Helen Keller
You will be happier when you do what you love instead of “settling” into doing things to get by.
Why do you do what you love? Because it is fun. It is the same with getting healthy. You do not need reasons to change your life, just a desire to start down the path in front of you and pursue your goals. And if that means quitting something now, in favor of something better later, then do not be afraid to cut loose – even if the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. Your old job is not your dream job, so do not expect it to be. You can more easily make the switch when you know you do not have to keep doing something you hate to survive or pay the bills.
“If life gives you lemons, ask for vodka.” – Unknown
We are not saying “do not drink at all.” Just have a drink of water instead of wine or beer or a few sips of wine if you feel like it, that is all I do. No, I am not a recovering alcoholic – I am just not a heavy drinker.
You must practice moderation in all areas of your life.
The only way to get ahead is to quit playing catches up. Do not wait until you have more money before you start saving or until the weather gets warmer before you plant your garden. Otherwise, winter will come, and you will not be ready.
Start now!
Do not wait too long, or you will never get around to planting that tree or starting that business or writing that book. (Note: I did not say you should quit your day job.)
It is easier to act when there is little to lose because you are not playing with fire. In other words, if your life sucks now, it is probably going to suck if you do not do anything so act while you have momentum.
And if you are doing something, it does not matter if it is too little, too late.
“The more you do, the more you will do.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Do not be afraid to start small and work your way up… because once you have started something new there is no going back.
You cannot go back and undo years of bad habits like binge drinking or smoking or not exercising. So best to get ahead of the curve by starting now with what is easy and available to you right now. Then build from there as needed because you are not going to be able to make those changes overnight. You must make small, forward progress and do it today because that is all you have.
For clarifications, questions or speaking engagement, send an email to fcveroya@askexph.com
